Building Lasting Connection
Nanny's Guide to Bonding with Children
seven ways to build connection
As a nanny, our role extends beyond simply caring for the physical needs of the children in our charge. We have the incredible opportunity to build lasting connections and bonds with them, shaping their lives in meaningful ways. The bonds we forge can have a profound impact on their emotional well-being, development, and overall happiness. So, how can we ensure that we create strong and lasting connections with the children you care for? Here are some best practices that I’ve implemented throughout my years as a nanny.
Be Present and Engaged:
Being present and engaged is so important. It teaches the children that they are worth investing in. And, if we’re honest with ourselves, sometimes it’s hard enough to show up to Put away distractions such as your phone or other electronic devices and focus your attention on the children. Show genuine interest in their activities, stories, and emotions. Listen actively, ask open-ended questions, and encourage them to express themselves. By giving them your undivided attention, you communicate that they are valued and important to you.
Establish Trust:
Trust is the foundation of any strong relationship. Take the time to build trust with the children by being consistent, reliable, and trustworthy in your actions. Be a sounding board that is kind. Be the person YOU would want to go to if there was something you needed to get off your chest. I know we all need that safe person, and you get the chance to be that for your kids… don’t wish it away.
Setting and Communicating Schedule:
Children thrive on structure and predictability…. let’s be honest, so do adults. No matter how old they are, work to create a schedule that includes regular activities, such as meal times, playtime, homework, and bedtime. Before starting a something new I always make sure to prepare my little one with a countdown or a tangible way for them to understand what is coming: Something as simple as “hey, in 5 minutes we’re going to leave the park, is there something you’d like to do before we go?” gives the children a sense of responsibility with their time and allows them to ease out of what they are currently doing into what you have prepared to do next.
Engage in Play:
Play is the language of children, and it offers a wonderful opportunity for bonding. Learn the things they love and lean in! Do they love music? Make a stage and let them perform for you. Do they thrive in art? Create an art station in the backyard or take an art class together. I promise, they won’t care if you’re good at it, but the fact that you will have taken time to show interesting things they love will communicate beyond words. And, in the meantime, you just might find things that bring YOU to life as well.
Respect Boundaries and Individuality:
Each child is unique, with their own preferences, strengths, and weaknesses. Respect their individuality and honor their boundaries. Understand that they may have different comfort levels when it comes to physical touch, personal space, or sharing emotions. Adapt your approach accordingly and create an environment where they feel seen, heard, and understood.
Be Honest:
Children are very smart. They can pick up on the days when you’re not yourself or distracted. They are learning from you how to be honest about where they are and what they are feeling. Don’t be too proud to apologize when you’re wrong.
Communicate with Parents:
Communication. The thing we (I!) often feel unskilled in yet need the most. Remember, you are a team and must work as a team to ensure and enhance the well-being of the children. Learn and understand their expectations, parenting styles, and any specific instructions or guidelines they may have. Give the parents updates them on the child's progress, milestones, and any concerns. You can implement this by creating an iPhoto album updating pictures and captions regularly! It’s fun for the whole family to be able to look back and celebrate each moment and milestone of the child.
Building lasting connections with children as a nanny is such a rewarding journey that requires time, patience, and genuine care. Remember, the bonds you form can have a profound impact on their lives and contribute to their overall happiness and development. Embrace this opportunity and savor the joy of connecting with children in meaningful ways.
You got this!
Send me an email and let me know how it’s going and how I can be cheering you on!
